Today I joined the grad students for a potluck, to which I contributed a pan of blondies. Right before I slid them in the oven I added chocolate chips and walnuts. "Should I leave the walnuts out?" I thought briefly. "Nah. Nut allergies aren't that common."
A student asked me about if there were any peanuts in the bake, and I told her clearly: no peanuts, but there are walnuts. No problem, she said, and took a slice.
A little bit later, she left the room. A little bit after that, another student followed. A few minutes afterward, the second student came back. "Does anyone have any Benadryl?" she said. "Kayla is having an allergic reaction that's different from anything she's ever had before. She's going to health services but she is hoping she can get some Benadryl right away. She isn't going to come back in the room because she seems to be reacting to nut particles in the air."
You guys, I just shriveled up inside. The idea that I had contributed to a student's respiratory distress when I could easily have kept the walnuts in my cupboard -- UGH. My colleague ran downstairs to see if any further assistance was needed, and came back once she had ensured that the student was in good hands. "You look terribly stressed," she said. "I feel so guilty that I put walnuts in the blondies," I told her.
About half an hour later the student showed up in my office doorway. One of her classmates, I think, must have told her what I said to my colleague. "Dr. Gladly," she said, "I am fine after a dose of Benadryl. I wanted to let you know that it wasn't the walnuts. I eat walnuts all the time. Another student put peanut butter in her brownies, and I reacted to those even though I didn't touch them. That's what was different for me: I've never reacted to peanuts from a distance before." We talked for a few minutes, and she really did seem fine. I teared up a little after she left -- I was so relieved that she was all right.
And I was relieved, too, that I hadn't been the cause of her distress. Is it weird to say that I think this is pandemic-related? I haven't been to a potluck since 2019. I think I've forgotten how to cook for people other than my family and friends. It used to be a fairly standard question: does anyone have any allergies? I'll remember to ask about it next time, that's for sure.
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