Careful what you pray for

Okay, so this is weird. And, frankly, unwelcome, and entirely unsurprising.

This morning I was praying in my dark and quiet house and I asked God to help me grow in holiness. I was thinking about how I've been focused on just getting through things for a while now. I haven't really been thinking about growth; I've just been keeping my head above water. "I'm ready to start growing again," I said this morning."

Soooooo maybe I should have seen this coming.

In my orbit there is a person who pushes every single button I have. The odds are low but not zero that the person in question will view this post, so I will not share the button-pushing details. Instead I will just say that if I were the elevator in which Charlie Bucket and Willie Wonka took flight, which in my memory if not in reality was simply covered in buttons, every one of my buttons -- every last one -- would have been thoroughly pushed in my past interactions with this individual.

Who is expecting to participate in festivities at my house later this week.

Who, despite having attended a gathering earlier this year at which everyone was supposed to be vaccinated, did not get vaccinated.

I could tell you more reasons why I think this decision is especially egregious in this particular set of circumstances, but I would just get all riled up again. No one reading this post will be surprised to learn that I think frequent interaction with vulnerable people necessitates special attention to COVID prevention.

But, as I was reminded earlier this evening, not everyone agrees with me on that one.

This is something I've been thinking a lot about lately, more and more as my patience wears thinner. Glaring at the folks who defy a store's mask mandate is not going to change any hearts. My narrowed eyes are unlikely to broaden their perspectives. But this isn't just about a 10-second interaction with a stranger in the toothpaste aisle at CVS. This is someone who wants to come to our house and sit at our table and eat our food, while also making choices that I find appalling.

This is also someone who just recovered from COVID, so the infection control question does not seem pressing. But the love-thy-neighbor question -- that's a whole 'nother kettle of fish. I have known for a while now that my attitude about vaccine refusal was not great for my soul. And hey-- here is my same-day answered prayer, my very own opportunity to grow in holiness.

So tomorrow morning in my dark and quiet house I will say to God, "OK, I forgot about your knack for hilarious timing. That was pretty much a stroke of comic genius there! And also-- what the heck do you want me to do?"