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Hello it is Laverne friends it is my last night here friends. I am trying to write while getting belly rubs so pardon any typos. Wait, Joe has a dirty forehead and I must lick it clean before I continue.

Honestly, these people and their insufficiently licked faces. What are they going to do without me?

So these are things you might not know about the Gladlys' House:

1. They have a Beeping Pot. I can almost reach it friends if I stand on my hind legs but then they say things like DOWN LAVERNE and OFF LAVERNE. Really though would you stay down and off if you lived in a house with a Beeping Pot full of good-smelling things? Today Jamie gave me some nibbles from the pot after they cooled down maybe there will be more nibbles tomorrow. 
2. Across the street there is an Evil Minion of Satan. They laugh when I get worried about her but friends I think you would be worried too because do you like Evil Minions of Satan? (Answer: no. You are a sensible reader. I can tell from here.) Jamie says, "Honestly, Laverne, you could eat that dog up in about four bites," but is Jamie eating any Evil Minions of Satan? No she is not.
3. I have a strategy for avoiding the EMoS do you want to know in case you need it for the future? Here you go: first you whimper very loudly in place and then you pull hard to the left for 25 yards while looking over your shoulder followed by a hard pull to the right while continuing to whimper. I have been doing this for five days now and I have not yet been eaten OR possessed by the EMoS so probably you should try it too.
4. In the back yard they have a Boing Machine and it is interesting also scary. Joe likes to boing very high on the Boing Machine and I cannot decide whether this is more interesting or more scary. I think he should stop doing flips though and give me more belly rubs.
5. People in this house think they can stop giving me belly rubs before I give them permission to stop. I am working hard to teach them better manners than that but some of them are kind of slow learners. Luckily for them I am a patient dog.

I am very sleepy friends very sleepy. For my first few nights here I needed to make sure that no one was breaking in and also that my other foster family was not waiting for me in the yard. So I would go to the front door and cry for my family and then I would go to the back door and whine GO AWAY to the intruders. The Gladlys did not understand that I was being Appropriately Vigilant and they said silly things like "Laverne lie down it's 1 in the morning" (see above re: slow learners).

But you know constant vigilance makes a girl pretty tired and I think I scared off all the intruders with my fierce relentless midnight whining. So maybe I will say good night friends it was nice talking with you let me know if anybody has any dirty faces at your house.