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April 19, 2018


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Skipping the point of your post to offer a virtual fist bump to my fellow extraverted introvert. It used to drive my kids crazy when I would claim introversion but converse with, say, waitresses or bank clerks. But I'm not the only one!

Ambiverts for the win.

I keep trying to put my finger on what drives people to take less-than-charitable viewpoints towards others. Do they fear losing their status, perceived or otherwise, or are they seeking some sort of validation about their beliefs through the media they consume? I can't tell.

Have you seen Scott Adam's theory of two movies on one screen:


It certainly describes the completely confident reactions on both sides,

On the "both these things cannot be true" feeling:

At some point before the election, I remember hearing a news report -- and I'm sorry I can't recall the outlet, the topic, or anything more useful! -- but I was dumbfounded at one point. There was a person interviewed who sounded pretty much opposite me on the political spectrum, and this person was saying how she (I think it was a woman) felt about people on MY side of things. And I thought, "THAT's what you think I think? But...but..." She was coming at an issue in a way I would never have expected, and I found it incredibly hard to see how she was getting from A to B -- but at the same time, she was upset because she thought people like me were getting from A to C in a way that croggled and disturbed her. Could we both be right? Could we both be wrong? I remember feeling a real sense of defeat: good golly, is THIS how far apart we are? We're both feeling misunderstood, and not-heard. And as misrepresented as I felt by her words, apparently she felt that my side was getting her side equally wrong. I didn't think we were...but she didn't think her side was getting mine wrong either, and I sure did. Could we both be right? Wrong? About the content, but also about our perceptions about each other? And about each other's perceptions of the content???

So...where does that leave us?

Well, nowhere, since she was simply being quoted by a news story I was listening to. But this really took the wind out of my sails that day.

This is a truly excellent (and VERY depressing) discussion/set of questions/ list of things I am also wondering about.

I love Kristin's comment too... It's so puzzling and so upsetting to think that it seems that people on opposite sides of the spectrum can't really understand each other like that.

About the waiter, I can kind of "get" where men like him are coming from regarding #MeToo even though I think they are wrong, but on the second case -- which is VERY close to home for me because I am religious and interact with a lot of conservative religious folks (although some are open minded too) -- I have a very hard time feeling sympathetic for the person's views. Sigh... I don't like my feelings, but I also value facts, and science, and "truth" (not the religious kind, but FACTUAL truth).

And, going back to your last paragraph and Kristin's comment, these are really a heartbreaking and baffling questions -- two opposite things like those you mention -- cannot be true! Who is "right" and who is "wrong"? Sigh... I feel so hopeless about life and country and politics and even the world, right now. Being an immigrant, personally knowing many DACA recipients, intensely helping refugee families, and working where I work (I cannot imagine how my students' parents felt last August about sending their kids to school) is JUST SO HARD right now! Sigh... Thanks for sharing your thoughts, as always!

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