You guys. YOU GUYS. Last night I was so wrung out and discombobulated that I thought I could use a piece of fruit as a plumbing tool AND THEN I thought that I should put it on the internet for all the world to see.
I need a verb other than "thought" for that sentence, a verb that means "my brain spewed out random bits of hopeful nonsense and I failed to screen them appropriately because I was so wrung out and discombobulated." How about "frangled"? Today I am not fringling, but yesterday I did frangle. (Spellcheck is having a cow over here, let me tell you.) Usually we only mark past tense in one way: either you change the vowel OR you add an -ed. But I am so eager for my fringling to be in the past that I am doing both. We are all done with the bananas in the pipes over here, folks.
I picked up one of those Zip It things at my neighborhood hardware store today, when the manager told me that she could never get a snake to work for her. I was able to move some gunk around (and lodge more of it under my fingernails, like the inverse of a French manicure), but I am hoping the plumber can fit me in double-quick.
I want to write a post about breastfeeding, but I feel I must create a little distance between fringle-frangle Jamie and writing-about-breastfeeding Jamie. Would you listen to a person who thought she could snake a pipe with a banana? I would not. (I mean, I did listen to a person who thought she could snake a pipe with a banana, but I know better now.)
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