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May 13, 2014


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This is wonderful, Jamie. It echoes many of my thoughts as I travel down this road of babyhood again with older kids at home. I'm enjoying this baby girl so much, and I know it's because of these things you write about so well.

Yes. This whole post. Except for the homemaker part which I have yet to figure out. The first six weeks with my oldest almost broke me. Now I adore the newborn period.

One of the biggest fights my husband and I ever had was about him holding the baby (#2) while I took a shower. I never would have imagined that now, years later, he makes my shower a priority and arranges the evening to make sure I get it. It is one of those things that make you grateful.

This is so encouraging to read! Thank you. I'm in the two child difficult stage, although I see bits of improvement as the baby nears one. What you share about your marriage is especially hopeful to read, since I am sometimes afraid mine will get worse with more children, rather than deepen and grow. God bless your family!

You are awesome and this was wonderful to read! Even going stright from two children to four I can see how much easier it was than when the second was tiny, and how necessary the hard parts were. I really hope I get to have another because now I am *good* at this baby thing and I want to do it again. Preferably with only one.

The last part about God loving the boy even more than you do... that part got me teary. :) Great post. (Great kids, too!)

Oh, Jamie, I can't tell you how much I needed to read that right now. Right very now. Today was Rachel's last school day, her last concert is tomorrow, and she graduates on Friday. I have been swatting with the broom - and acting as kind as the type of person who would typically ride one.

Thank you for this great reminder that God knows the plans he has for her and I do not. My goal for the rest of the week is to trust Him more and fret (and swat) less.

read & didn't have time to comment earlier, but I think what you're saying makes sense... I stopped at two, though, so I'll never know from experience! (Having my second baby was very tough for me, though. I knew how to do everything (and things did go way more smoothly), but I was overwhelmed by having two. I think I understand how having several more would become progressively easier!)

In any case, my experience is pretty different from yours e.g. I don't think having the boys had a negative impact on our marriage, we'd been married for too long! (7 years) & I think I have not become a better homemaker (unfortunately, perhaps?!), but I can still relate.

And I'm pretty scared of having to mother a teen! Sigh... May God help me(us) bring up my (our) sons to be always close to Him and, hopefully to us (their family).

Agree with everything except your homemaker point. But my kids are much, much closer in age than yours are. Right now my oldest is just shy of eight and she's a dreamer, I simply cannot reliably delegate to her at all. And none of them are much help at keeping house, even when they are in reasonably good moods and trying to be helpful. The best I can hope for is that they might pitch in and not make me clean up all the mess they made on my own.
Sure, I fold less laundry than I did with two because I've given up on putting away laundry. It sits in baskets in the laundry room, unfolded. Most of my housekeeping has devolved into radically lowered standards. My mantra is: I don't have time or energy to deal with that thing I once did reasonably well. I can guess that in a few more years the tides will shift. My second child has started sometimes spontaneously taking her laundry to her room to put away. My boys both have reasonable tidy streaks that I can imagine will eventually develop into responsibility and helpfulness. But right now they are simply too immature and I'm too overwhelmed to take the time to teach them to do stuff. Right now it's just gritting my teeth and waiting for the chaotic season to pass.

This is good. Very much mirrors my experience. Regarding housekeeping--I think it kicks in around age ten, being able to trust your kids to reliably co-maintain their parts of the mess.

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