I've been in a funk, my friends. I've been trying to find a part-time academic job for next year with no success and it's been weighing on me. I've been thinking, "Maybe it wasn't a calling to go get a PhD. Maybe it was a hallucination. Maybe I should have kept right on homeschooling but instead I've subjected my children to five years of public school and intermittently distracted mothering and whatever is wrong with them in the future will be all my fault."
I kept going into the Adoration chapel on Thursday mornings and saying, "I need a job for next year." And I kept hearing the same thing: "Wait."
"Wait" is not my favorite thing to hear. I am bad at waiting. I like strategies, and Plans A/B/C. Ask me to choose between action and waiting and I'll pick action, hands down.
"Wait" leaves you vulnerable. Noah built an ark on dry land and waited for the rain -- can you imagine what his neighbors said? Jesus left the planet and kept the apostles waiting for ten days before the mysterious Comforter put in an appearance -- did they have moments of wondering what he could have been talking about?
Last night my phone rang in the middle of the kids' section at Barnes & Noble, a number I didn't recognize. The caller identified herself over the background of my noisy daughter: the chair of the department here in town. She asked if it would be better to talk the next day. Mercifully, providentially, I didn't try to have a conversation then, because Stella lost her mind, wailing and shrieking in the floor, about two minutes later. (She likes to rearrange the merchandise. She wanted to take some children's books over to the fitness section, and a children's backpack to the rack of adult bags. I said no because she hates it when I return things to the kids' section and I'm not going to leave stuff in random places for employees to deal with later; drama ensued.)
This Thursday my Adoration hour fell right before our schedule phone call. This Thursday I knelt down to pray and I heard something different: "It's for you." I hesitate even to tell you that, because people do ALL KINDS of wacky things based on what they think the Lord told them. But listen to what happened next--
You might remember that I knew one of the faculty here in town had applied for an administrative job, and that if she got it there would be some gaps in the teaching lineup for fall. I had begun to assume this hadn't happened, though, since it's getting pretty late in the summer. That's what I was expecting to hear about when I talked to the chair this morning, but it turns out a completely different faculty member is making a surprise move and giving her just a few week's notice to get things sorted out.
She asked if I could teach a class outside my area of expertise and I assured her I could. She asked if the scheduled time could work for me and I assured her it could.
She offered me the position over the phone: one class in the fall and one in the spring.
A part-time academic position, that elusive beast, in the department that's less than a ten-minute walk from my house.
It's exactly the thing I've spent five years hoping for, dropped into my lap just as I was beginning to think gloomily that I'd need to find a part-time clinical job.
I am so overwhelmingly grateful it brings tears to my eyes.
Oh, my friend! It brings me tears to MY eyes too! And you know that I know EXACTLY what this all means... (minus the part of sending the kids to public school, mine are younger, only one year of Kelvin's schooling coincided with my pursuit of the phd -- I can only imagine how hard that was).
In any case. We *must* wait on the Lord. As we were driving to PA this evening, my husband was saying to me, "you know, if we are with the Lord, he doesn't let us go, He takes care of us. Very hard things may happen, but He'll direct everything" -- he was thinking of when he lost his job, and we were discussing our decision to forgo his job offer in Georgia (over half a million of start up funds) to live a simpler life in VA -- and because I HAD a part time job here and not there in GA.
I'm really happy for you and will be praying that you can continue to have employment with them in the future. (if that's His will)
Posted by: Lilian | July 21, 2011 at 11:05 PM
Oh, good for you! I'm glad!
Posted by: Jen | July 22, 2011 at 03:36 AM
Congratulations! I hope that you've been walking on air with the news!
Posted by: Kathy | July 22, 2011 at 06:09 AM
Oh wow. I could not be happier to hear this. So, so glad to hear this, so happy for you, so happy that you made it through the waiting and that this job is perfect.
Posted by: rachel | July 22, 2011 at 06:48 AM
"A part-time academic position, that elusive beast, in the department that's less than a ten-minute walk from my house."
Elusive beat indeed -- the dream of many an academic mom! So glad to hear this, and so happy for you. Congrats and well done!
Posted by: Kristin | July 22, 2011 at 06:56 AM
Huzzah! (For God, of course... ;-D )
Posted by: Salome Ellen | July 22, 2011 at 07:59 AM
That's great news, Jamie. I am so glad.
Posted by: Jody | July 22, 2011 at 08:09 AM
Oh my, how amazing. Congratulations, and enjoy your funk-free weekend!
Posted by: el-e-e | July 22, 2011 at 09:15 AM
Wonderful news and I couldn't be happier for you!
I hope that this will allow you to feel better about your childrens' education. Is there anything you like about their school? Or maybe that's a whole blog post of its own.
In any case, I am so very happy for you to be reaping fruit from your labor!
Posted by: Celeste | July 22, 2011 at 11:44 AM
Yaay! Congrats!
Posted by: Kris | July 22, 2011 at 12:20 PM
Wonderful news!
(I wish God would whisper to me while I pray. I've been smacked upside the head by God a few times in my life, but never whispered to. Though maybe God tried whispering but resorted to smacking because I wasn't paying attention...)
Posted by: jecathre | July 22, 2011 at 12:55 PM
Yay!! I'm so so very happy for you!
Posted by: Shannon | July 22, 2011 at 07:26 PM
Brought tears to my eyes too! Congratulations!!! (and happy belated birthday) :)
Posted by: Angela | July 22, 2011 at 07:49 PM
Ooohhhh wonderful. And while I don't have the prayer life you do, this reminds me of a truth I have been shown again and again and keep forgetting because I AM SLOW: God drops exactly what you need into your life exactly when you need it, whether you think it's what you need or not. Apparently what I needed on this night sleep eludes me was this post.
Posted by: AmyinMotown | July 24, 2011 at 01:57 AM
So thrilled for you! What a blessing. Great way to listen to the Holy Spirit talking to you!
Posted by: Rebecca | July 24, 2011 at 08:27 PM
Such delightful news! Learning to listen is so important, yet so very challenging for me to do. I should work on it and see what I'm missing. Your faithfulness has been rewarded!
Posted by: Renee | July 26, 2011 at 09:07 AM
God is so good!
Posted by: RebeccaL | July 26, 2011 at 10:29 AM
YAYYYYY! Congrats :) You will be wonderful!
Posted by: gina | July 26, 2011 at 10:57 AM
SO so glad Jamie :)
-Amanda
Posted by: mandamum | July 27, 2011 at 06:55 PM
Jamie, that is positively wonderful! Do you mind if I share this post with a friend who is also waiting?
Posted by: Marcie | July 30, 2011 at 10:48 AM
You're OK, right? Just enjoying some well-earned peace and calm, yes? I just got paranoid that the position evaporated or something.
Posted by: rachel | August 03, 2011 at 11:43 PM
Just found your blog and am adding it to my reader this minute!
Hooray for part-time academic jobs! It's what I've been doing for three semesters and it is the perfect balance between motherhood (I have three boys 4, 2, and 7 mo) and a career. Best wishes!
Posted by: Becca | August 12, 2011 at 11:59 AM