Blargh

Remember when I told you that my defense was open to the public and (HA HA HA) you could come if you were in town? and listen to my talk about my dissertation for two hours? Remember?

Well, guess who's coming to my open-to-the-public defense! Guess!

[wait, you can't really guess without more backstory]

There's a professor in my department whose work I admire but with whom I spent the single most awkward hour of my doctoral program. I had asked her if she would be on my committee and she said (a) this study is not a good idea because you're looking for a link that doesn't exist and (b) are you sure you have an adequate theoretical grounding to look at this stuff anyway? and (c) I'm interested in younger kids than you're going to study so (d) NO.

That's who's coming to my defense.

Argh. I was feeling pretty peaceful about the whole thing until my advisor forwarded me the other prof's email saying she'd be there. My advisor knows the story and had my back after that conversation -- actually went to the other prof and said, "What was up with that?" The two of them have a friendly relationship so it's unlikely that there's a secret backstabby plot afoot to torpedo my defense and flunk me out of the doctoral program.

But STILL. Instead of making slides I am fretting about my theoretical background. I am reading articles that are only tangentially related to my study because they are up her alley.

Someone advised me to take chewy food along to the defense -- food to create a harmonious atmosphere and chewy to keep the faculty from asking too many awkward questions. Tell you what, my friends, a big bowl of saltwater taffy is going right in front of Professor No. Maybe with some rubber cement on the side.