Rachel said:
This is a hot button, I know, so please forgive any crude phrasings on a delicate issue. As a foreigner living in the States, I'm suprised and slightly puzzled by the idea of home schooling. I've had it explained to me as a fundamentalist way of avoiding any contact with the government/state; I suspect you would explain it very differently, and would really like to hear your reasons and experiences. Any chance?
Thanks for asking, Rachel. I would indeed explain it differently. We homeschool because we believe it's the best choice for our kids right now, academically, socially, and spiritually.
Academically, homeschooling affords me the freedom to help my kids acquire a rich and thorough understanding of the world around them. In some areas I am more rigorous than a classroom teacher would be; in others I'm more relaxed.
As an example: I'm a believer in memorization, even though it's out of vogue among most educators. I think it's easier to be a good writer if your head is filled with examples of good writing. My two oldest sons just learned "The Charge of the Light Brigade"; starting tomorrow we'll tackle "The Raven."
On the other hand, I haaaaaaated doing endless worksheets in school. Is it necessary to do 30 problems to hammer home a straightforward math concept? I say categorically: no. Ditto for grammar exercises, the memory of which causes my eyes to glaze over so fast you'd think I had a nictitating membrane. (When Jamie [thinked/thought] about her elementary schools' approach to language arts instruction, she [lay/laid] down on the floor and said, "[Shoot/Bludgeon] me now.")
With homeschooling, you can go at your kids' pace. Do they need some extra help? No problem -- your tiny class size means you can handle it. Are they ready to move faster? Off you go.
Rachel also asked, "How do you deal with a teaching subject that isn't your strong suit?" When it comes to drawing, I have the ability of an abalone. I am approaching it from a few different angles. I have a book called Drawing with Children, which I am slowly working through alongside the kids. I have a talented friend who teaches my boys art twice a month. I have also enrolled my oldest son in park district art classes. I expect this approach will work for as long as we homeschool: I can learn more myself, or I can find someone else to teach my kids, or I can do both at the same time.
The most common question about homeschooling is "What about socialization?" I homeschool in part because of the socialization issue: school socialization can be negative as well as positive. You can bet than in a house with four boys, each child will get ample practice in the arts of appropriate negotiation and respectful disagreement. In a classroom, there can be a lot of under-the-radar cruelty and nonsense. In my home, the bar is set pretty high: the key question about behavior toward others is not "Is it disruptive?" but "Is it loving?" (There are days, of course, when not a one of us clears that bar. But we keep trying.)
I do try to provide my kids with opportunities to learn the social skills they'd develop in a classroom: working in groups with other kids, solving problems without adult intervention, taking instruction from other adults whose style differs from mine, waiting for turns in conversation or, just occasionally, at the water fountain. One advantage of homeschooling is that time wasted standing in lines is kept to a minimum. I certainly hope my kids don't grow up to work in jobs where they have to ask permission and wait in line to use the bathroom. In small doses, though, it's worth practicing.
Our faith is a major reason why we homeschool. We reject without reservation the bunker mentality that says "Keep your kids home because the schools are full of evil." (I do think it's easier to safeguard a healthy innocence when you homeschool, but I'm not teaching my kids at home because I'm afraid of the schools here.) Our family hopes to become a "city on a hill"; homeschooling allows us time and space for construction projects.
My foremost goal for each of my children is a transforming relationship with the living God. I want my children to live their faith: to know its tenets well, to keep asking hard questions, to grow day by day in the discipline of yieldedness. I want them to look at their lives through the lens of the greatest commandments: how can I love God today? how can I love my neighbor?
I am all stirred up at this moment, carried away with my efforts to get across the vision I have for my boys. How I hope they will grow into men who will inhabit this world gracefully and leave it a wiser, richer place. The reality right now: an 8yo who grouses almost every day about the work before him, a 5yo still learning that I expect him to ask permission before he dashes away from the table to run around in lopsided circles, a 3yo who interrupts my explanation of the Bernoulli effect to say, "Will you be Obi-Wan Kenobi now?", and a baby who has been known to spit up on a writing assignment as a I lean over it to correct its punctuation. But the vision remains regardless.
Over and over in the schools I attended we asked, "Why are we learning this stuff?" I hope my homeschooled sons can say that we learn because there's joy in learning. I hope they also know that learning is good stewardship: we train our eyes to see the beauty and mystery of the world around us, our ears to hear God's call. We train our minds to reason and remember; we train our hearts to say gladly, "Here I am, Lord; I come to do your will."
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Some of you homeschool; some of you (like Tracy) used to homeschool; many of you don't and perhaps wouldn't. Please join in the conversation -- why do you do what you do? If you homeschool, I'd rather hear about homeschooling plusses than about school minuses (though I will acknowledge that No Child Left Behind is a factor in my decision to homeschool). Rachel, let me know if this answers your questions. Some days I may feel a little crazy, but I think our decision to homeschool is pretty sane.
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