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September 28, 2004


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Wow. just wow.
I wanted to be a midwife since the age of 10 (when I read my mom's copy of Childbirth Without Fear). But I didn't think I could handle the puke, the pain, the blood and guts and emotional stuff - until I had children. After I had children, I realized that I could do anything (well, almost). thus began the 20 year oddyssey.

I agree, rearing children is humbling and maturing and sloughs off most selfishness. But I have to say to Alicia, you have a gift if you don't mind the greusomeness of blood and such. I feel no qualms about my kids' body fluids at all, but I have looked upon other people's as scary germ factories. For me, the herculian patience and strength is mostly applied to kin and loved ones. Although I'd certainly try to help someone in distress if they were ill, I wouldn't do it without discomfort. With my kids I wouldn't even think about how it affected me. I think that's one of Jamie's points, is that having a child to care for makes one selfless, and being selfless is like a salvation. I think being a healer and midwife must be very much like that too.

What a beautifully written post of honest, moving reflections.

This is my first visit (I followed Summer's recommendation) and I just want to read more, more, more. Thank you.

In a similar yet darker vein, graffiti in Paris subways scrawled in Arabic can be found in numerous stations to read like so: "We will defeat you with our mothers!" Conclusion...Christian women need to have babies and Christian men need to be fathers and husbands.

I agree with this post's premise of childbearing as salvation (for many women), and think it reinforces another. What is good for your soul is good for everybody else too.

Another great post, Jamie!

A thought-provoking post, Jamie! I had never thought of the mirroring of Jesus' sacrifice in a mother's sacrifices. Reading that made me sit up and say "wow!" Very insightful. Thanks for writing.

This is my first visit to your blog (via Fructus Ventris), and so well worth it. Thanks for the "centering." Now I'm ashamed of myself for groaning as I was lying in bed on my side nursing my youngest to sleep the other night and my two-year old crawled on top of me, draped herself along my body and went to sleep. Suddenly, it seems like it was actually kind of sweet.

Your disclaimer above regarding infertility or moms who adopt or bottlefeed while thoughtful, may not be necessary (at least not in my case). As a wanna-be-mom who is infertile and will be adopting and bottlefeeding, I felt in no way that you are advocating childbirth as the only way to holiness or real motherhood. Your writing shows love for your children and for your vocation - I may have to work an alternate means to secure my motherhood vocation, but I know God is working in me just as if I could experience pregnancy and birth. That is the miracle of Grace. You have a fabulous place here and I will be visiting often as I continue to wait for my turn at mommyhood. Thank you!

Thank you for your comments, all of you. I'm glad you enjoyed the post. Special note to Sparki: every time I have mentioned impatience at bedtime in the confessional, the priest has said, "Hey, bedtime is rough for everybody. You're all tired. Don't be too hard on yourself." The good thing about messing up bedtime is that it always comes around again. Practice makes perfect, right?

I stumbled upon your blog today while looking for info on Gladlys. I instantly recognized a kindred spirit! I applaud you for your honesty, strength, spirit, and humor. As a doula I work with women to start their mothering out right with a beautiful birth experience. As a former La Leche League leader I encourage and help them to achieve a good breastfeeding dyad. As a Catholic and a Christian I as St. Anne's help with difficult or trying births. As a mother of 4 now grown children I thank God for *all* the experiences of motherhood, the good, the bad, and the ugly. And I love the way you portray all of that! Thank you so much!

absolutely gorgeous post. I hadn't even started to blog yet back in September 04. Linton was not yet 4 months old. wow. I'm clicking back to as far back as the blog will take me! ;-)

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