The fall semester was really hard. I hope I wasn't too whiny here, but it was AWFULLY hard. If I'd had more than one semester left, I would have thought about taking a leave of absence from the program. Or maybe just dropping out.
I knew it would be harder once the baby got mobile. The combination of mobile baby + decreased availability of favorite babysitter + TAing for a class that wound up twice as big as planned when they opened it up to undergrads-- wow, that was a tough combination.
For the first time since I started the program, I found myself unable to meet self-imposed deadlines. I'll get this done by x date, I'd say -- only I wouldn't.
I hate missing deadlines.
I have some more self-imposed deadlines looming, and I am ready to get back into Person Who Meets Deadlines mode. I need to get a chunk of my dissertation written up and sent along to my advisor. (In a moment of madness I told her I'd get it to her by Wednesday.) I need to finish a Christmas gift for someone I'll be seeing on Thursday. (I'm into the toe decreases on the second sock, so I should be okay unless I break my wrist or something.) I have some end-of-year tax stuff to finish. And then I have two non-essential tasks that I'd really like to complete. Every year for the past decade I have read a Dickens novel and a Shakespeare play, but 2009 is rapidly drawing to a close and I have finished neither. It seems a little silly to spend time on those things when I have essentials awaiting my attention. But I miss being that person who can set herself a task and be reasonably certain of getting it done, and so I am going to make the effort.
We are heading off to the library, where I'm hoping I can finish a sock toe while reading to Pete and Stella. Perhaps I can even squeeze in a half-chapter of Hard Times if they get excited about the train table. Wish me luck!