Shore Leave

Hershey bar: Hey, Captain, looking for a good time?

Willpower: Are you addressing me? An officer in Her Majesty's Navy? I have a ship to keep on course, madam, and I'll thank you to keep your trollopy offers to yourself.

HB: You look like you've been running that ship a long time, Captain. Shall we dally?

WP, icily: That, madam, would be fraternising with the enemy.

HB, meltingly: It's awfully lonesome here in the refrigerator. Can't you bring a girl out where it's warm?

WP, wavering: Maybe there's no harm in succouring a lady in distress.

HB, inwardly: I'll show you suckering...

***

It occurs to me that if I am imagining a candy bar thinking devious thoughts, there might be something hallucinogenic in my salads. It could be. I've been eating a whole lot of salads. Scale was down 4 pounds this morning, though, in spite of last night's indiscretion, so I see more salad in my future. (That's probably a blip -- I'm betting it will be back up by a pound or two tomorrow. But still, progress.)

Comments

[bearing]

Why Jamie, it profits a woman nothing to give her willpower for a whole bar of really fantastic dark Belgian chocolate...

But for Hershey's?

(semi-obscure cinematic reference here)

[Jamie]

Ohhh, you are so right. In the draft version of this post that was running around my head last night, there was an exchange about the cheapness and not-worth-it-ness of Hershey's chocolate as opposed to, say, Callebaut.

[jAbe]

Jamie + dieting + Navy novels + kids home for the summer = the food in the fridge is acting sexy. I am taking proactive preventive steps to guard against such hallucinations by eating two bowls of brownie ice cream, STAT. It could be catching.